And in other news...

Life does go on. Many school issues are feeling a little better. There is supervision on the playground in the morning. We don't have lice yet. Zane says that if I want to, we can pay to put coat hooks in the classroom. (Yes, he is that sick of hearing me worry about it.) I am still concerned with some of the issues, but it's been fun having people call me nearly every day since I last blogged and tell me that they agree, and I'm not crazy. The good news is that according to my traffic counter, I've had literally hundreds of visits to my blog from computers linked to school internet service providers, so I am considering selling ad space to Scholastic and calling it a second income!

Now, as promised...

The girls were adorable for back to school. They are both doing great this year. They both love their teachers. Meredith is learning lots of Chinese from Mr. Atkinson, and likes to impress us with her knowledge. She is even teaching it to Isaac. Ruthie is slightly concerned that she has not learned anything new yet. We have tried to explain that teachers always have to review at the first of a new school year to help everybody get back on track. She came home very excited about a volcano unit, and I told her, "See, you are learning new things now!" She told me, "No,it's fun, but it isn't new. I've been reading non-fiction since kindergarten, Mom." Then she rolled her eyes at me. Because that is the kind of attitude she has these days.

Lucy went on her first tractor ride a few weeks ago. Grandpa drove her out to the field and picked her an apple, which is one of her favorites. When I tried to get her off the tractor, she just dismissed me with a wave and a "No!" Which is what she usually does when she manages to snag Grandpa time, and which delights him to no end.


And this lovely picture of Meredith with a fish was taken on her fieldtrip to Old Capitol Days in Fillmore. It was fun to go on the field trip with her. We learned how to shoot a cannon, how to carve wood sculptures, and weave on a loom. We also got to listen to mountain men and a blacksmith. It makes me happy that she wanted me to go. In fact, she was so afraid some other mom would beat me to the punch that she insisted I call the school from Swiss Days to reserve the coveted "Field Trip Parent" position.

Speaking of Swiss Days, I had the strangest thing happen to me there. Mom and I were sitting at a table eating lunch. It was crowded and two men and two women asked if they could sit with us. We scooted over to make room, and one of the women remarked to me, "Oh, no. If you are sitting by my husband, you better guard your food." We all laughed and continued eating, although the man sitting next to me WAS uncomfortably close. Table space was at a premium, and he kept scooting closer to me. After each scoot, he would say, "Are you okay?", probably in response to me leaning away from him. I finished eating, and laid my fork down, and he leaned over and said, "Are you going to eat those cherries?" I glanced at my pie plate and said that I was finished. He proceeded to grab a potato chip from his plate, reach across and scoop up and eat a cherry from my plate. Then another, and another, until even the cherry juice had been scooped and gobbled. Just as I was thinking, enough's enough, and Mom and I were getting ready to go, he leaned forward, looked at Mom and said, "Aren't you going to eat your cookie?" We handed it over and scooted away post haste. So bizarre. I guess you just never know what is going to happen at Swiss Days.

Millard School District stinks...

You know those people who write nothing but complaints and negativity on their blogs? Well, be prepared.... and for the record, I never claimed NOT to be one of those people...

So school has started. And I have a few little concerns. First of all, they had warned us that the buses would come twenty minutes earlier this year. Last year, our bus came at 7:25, give or take a few minutes. And there, bright and early on the first day of school, at 7:04, was a school bus stopped across the road. Now, I realize the the high school actually does start 20 minutes earlier this year, and so does the middle school, but the elementary school? Not so much. They start FIVE minutes earlier. Which means, I suppose that I should put my seven and nine year olds on the bus and let them ride it for an hour and twenty minutes, give or take a few minutes? Excuse me? Have you ever seen a little kid who has ridden in the car for an hour? They are totally incapable of functioning at a conscious level, let alone learning and thinking as I would hope they are doing at school.

That is not the only bus problem. There are three (yup, three) buses that pick up kids in the Deseret /Oasis area. The kids whose stops are nearest my home on the other bus routes get on the bus at 7:24 and 7:28. Um, excuse me again? My kids are on the bus nearly half an hour longer than the kids half a mile up the road? Guess why... I know you're dying to. Well clearly, the logical reason is apparent... the bus my kids ride HAS to leave earlier so that they can get to the golf course and pick up the kids there. Yeah, why wouldn't the kids who live seven miles south of town drive to town, continue three miles north, and THEN turn around and go to the high school? Then the middle school. THEN the elementary school. Which brings us to the next error in planning (that may actually be a more serious problem than the fact that drunk monkeys are, in fact, drawing doodles on a map that the head drunk monkey then passes out as bus routes.)

Having determined that the only solution to the "sorry, my kid can't take a spelling test because she is still in the restroom, carsick from the bus ride that could actually have driven her to a less crowded school in Springville because it really, truly took THAT long" problem was to drive my children to school every day for the remainder of the year (gas budget be damned), I arrived at school today a little early- around 8:00. Imagine my shock when I saw a playground LOADED with kids, and no adults to be seen. I was a little concerned when two of Meredith's friends came catapulting into the parking lot to greet her as she arrived, with nary a word from a grown-up to warn of the possible dangers of running into the place where cars are dropping kids off (probably because there are other parents like me who are less than crazy that their kid, who lives two miles from the school, will be on the bus for 45 minutes.) The good news is that my bus time estimate was actually 30 minutes off. The bad news is that the children who rode the bus are actually on a playground just off Main Street, Delta, Utah totally unsupervised for that 30 minutes. I understand that the district policy has always been that playgrounds are not supervised before school, which policy I assume was published far and wide to deter over-eager parents from dropping their children off an hour before school because they were on their way to work. But if the buses are FORCING the kids to be at school 30 minutes before it starts, shouldn't SOMEBODY be responsible? I am sure they tell the kids to stay in the fenced playground areas, but anyone who has ever met a kid knows that a rule not enforced consistently will be obeyed for all of thirty seconds. I am not for a moment suggesting that the teachers should have one more thing added to their list of responsibilities, but perhaps someone should be hired for this purpose, like they hire people for the crosswalks. So now I guess I will have to drive my kids to school, drop them off, and then proceed to watch them so they will not be kidnapped, bullied, or otherwise molested in the interim before the bell rings.

Problem number three with this school year... the architect who designed the School-Formerly-Known-As-The-North-Elementary was a MORON. (I can think of a better term, but I'm trying to keep my ranting as G-rated as possible.... you're welcome!) There is a "coat closet" (feel free to substitute "Lice Farm" in your mind) that is about two feet wide and three feet tall, into which you are supposed to cram thirty two coats, thirty two backpacks, etc. Because of this storage issue, the kids have special bag requirements as to size and shape. That's fine, I suppose- I know having taught school that you have to make do with what you have. But seriously, would it kill them to install a row of hooks along the back classroom wall? Because honestly, there are going to be lice. Someone once told me that during lice check, they always had twice as many cases at the North as they did at the South. Now, I'm no doctor, but look at the "coat closet" (lice farm.) Mystery solved.

Also, and this is probably an offshoot of the former problem of storage stupidity, but Ruthie was telling me today she sure wished she could take her Chinese jump rope to school. I told her that she should take it tomorrow, to which she sadly replied, "I can't. The rule at this dumb school is that we can only play with the school playground equipment. We can never bring anything from home." I told her she should get a regular jump rope from the school equipment, but was informed that there are only two per class and she felt like she would never get a turn. I understand that in a facility that is totally inadequate in space and storage, it would be a problem if every boy brought a bat and ball, and every girl brought a soccer ball, but a freaking jump rope? Either buy more playground equipment or let parents supplement. (I am purposely not even going to get started on the glaring lack of actual playground equipment built into the playgrounds.)

Next problem... (you thought I was done? Ha, ha... you're funny!) At one point during the discussions before the Big Elementary School Shake-Up of 2009 (as I like to think they will one day refer to it in the history books, or at least in the Great Basin Museum Annals), our glorious superintendent assured us that "in this district we pride ourselves on our smaller than average class sizes." He went on to say that the best thing about having all the grade levels in the same facility would be the ability to add a class if there were too many in one grade level, while saying that if only half the kids were in a facility, there would likely never be enough surplus to add another whole class. I believe the numbers he stated were that if there were ever enough overall students in a grade K-2 to make a class of 24 or in grade 3-5 to make a class of 26, another class would be formed. Enter Meredith's fourth grade class of 32. And all the other fourth grade classes of 31 or 32. And if you're snappy with math, you could probably figure out that five classes with 31 or 32 COULD actually make 6 classes of 26. But- and this is the good part- go ahead and ask me if there are 6 classes of 26. Heck, no! Because guess what! That time when the first grade teachers from the School-Formerly-Known-As-The-South-Elementary pointed out that there were fewer classrooms than teachers? Remember that time- you remember, when our glorious superintendent laughed at them and made belittling remarks? Well, it turns out that those first grade teachers HAD actually honed their counting skills in their careers of teaching the little tykes to do it, and they were right. There is no freaking place to put another class in the piddly school building we are using. So Meredith will have the exquisite joy of going through a year in a classroom with nowhere to put a coat, and thirty-some-odd other little bodies (including the two naughtiest kids in her grade level, but that's a whole 'nother story.)

And do you know what the worst part is? I can't bring myself to believe that sharing my concerns (even in a much more positive way than I am sharing them here) would do any good. I sat through too many meetings last year to think that anybody gives a rat's fanny what the parents think. I still feel the decisions that were made were inadequately researched and too quickly enacted. Our (glorious) superintendent is sure enough of his opinions that he doesn't even need anybody else's to go ahead and cause massive upheavals. Really, there's nothing anybody can do about the overcrowding and the crappy building at this point. And I'm not stupid enough to believe that the bus situation will be rectified at any time soon.

Now, in my frustration, I am quick to point out that I am absolutely enamored of both of my daughters teachers this year (not that I expected to be otherwise, being quite pleased with most of the elementary school teachers in our district.) I feel bad for them, having to live through road bumps I am sure are even worse then mine. I am sure that despite the district mismanagement, and willingness to throw the elementary schools under the bus to accomodate the high school, that both of my girls will have a positive experience this year. I have actually really enjoyed driving them to school (for the whole two days I've done it so far.) I'm thrilled that when Meredith came home today and told me what she did at all her recesses it was "mostly I just hung upside down on the monkey bars with Zach" because I LOVE that she has cousins in her school. But it's aggravating. If people would just let me run the world, it would go so much more smoothly for everyone. Now, I have to go to bed, because come 8:00 tomorrow morning, I'm a bus driver. Remind me one of these days to post the cute back to school pictures and tell you the happy, glossed-over details of the other positives of back to school. I'm sure they're in there somewhere. Right now, I am just claiming the right to be a good old- fashioned, over-protective, growly mama lion with nary a private school in sight to improve our scholarly outlook.

TWELVE!!!

Twelve loads of laundry today.... twelve! That is a lot of laundry. The only person without an overflowing basket of laundry to put away in the morning is Ruthie, and that is only because she just alternates between two outfits every day until they are walking around by themselves, what with the dirt and all, and I finally force her to change. Still, twelve load seems a bit excessive. I had to use the clothesline in shifts- I filled and emptied it three times, which is impressive, considering I have a fairly long, four rows of wire model that holds a lot. That's what I get for letting the laundry slide for a week and three days rather than the usual week.

Am so tired. Can't remember last time was so tired. Wish caffeine would help me stay up and finish work. Zane had temerity to point out that the Ensign had an article about the evils of caffeine I should read. Pointed out to him that:
A. Already read the article
B. Am totally immune to caffeine effects at this point
and
C. Thought of yummy Diet Coke is sole motivating factor for getting out of bed many mornings.

I should probably let work wait. Tomorrow is busy- sewing day, shopping day, taking kids to Primary water party day... I think work will have to wait until Wednesday.

How do you know when it is WAY past nap time?

I really don't know how to change the orientation of the video, so just tilt your head to the right, and that will be pretty much what it looked like when I taped it this afternoon. One of these days, I'll quit being lazy and using my point and shoot to record video, since I do actually own a video camera. It's just that it's hot, and I'd have to walk all the way down the hall to get it.....

Hey, wait... where did summer go?

We are having a fabulous summer. We have only been home two weekends since the end of May (and one of those we were gone during the weekdays!) The kids and I visited Grandma Swain and Uncle Kent, and while we were there we got to see Aunt Barbara, Kimberly, Brooke and Brandon. We went to a family reunion at Palisade in Manti, which was so much fun. We split up one week and Zane and the big kids camped while my mom, Lucy, and I did a quilt store shop hop that ran from Springville through Logan and to Tooele. I honestly can't remember what else we've done this summer, but I did happen to find the pictures of our family trip two weekends ago and thought that might be as good a place to start as any.

We started at an Orem Owls game. (Or, to be more accurate, with me dropping my entire family off at the game.) The kids mostly played on the playground and ran amok with the wooden bats they were giving away at the gate. They did go down before the game and have the players autograph baseballs- because you never know who might get famous someday! I ran up to get Mom's house key from Lindsey so we could stay in Salt Lake for our vacation. To be fair, I fit in a little bit of shopping as well, before heading back to the game to meet the kids.



The next morning we headed to "This is the Place" State Park. It was their free family day, and they had lots of activities going on (including free popsicles all over the place- very refreshing since it was plenty hot.) We figured out about half an hour into the day that my attention span is much shorter than Zane's is. He likes to really get into the museum type stuff and learn about it. I like to walk past and say, "Wow, that's great. Glad I saw it." So we split up. I took the big kids and we went and rode the train, played the kid games, and petted the animals.


Zane, being the super dad that he is, strapped Lucy to himself (100 degree heat notwithstanding) and went and read plaques or something. Not sure. We were playing somewhere else with our lack of attention to detail and failure to appreciate the museum learning experience.

It seems to be a pretty good system for us. We left after a few hours, and close on the heels of Ruthie announcing, "You guys! I am dehyrdrating back here!"

That afternoon, Zane took Meredith, Isaac, and Lucy to the church history museum and family history center. There aren't any pictures of that because I took the camera and took Ruthie on a belated birthday date! We started at the Spaghetti Factory- a mutual favorite destination.

After lunch, we went school clothes shopping, bought fudge at Gardener Village, go lost in Copperton while looking for Redwood Road (don't ask) and finished the day off with pizza and swimming at Grandma and Grandpa's condo.

While Ruthie and I were gone, Isaac was playing on the balcony at the condo, and decided it would be a good idea to pick a tomato from the plant and throw it at the people in the pool. Then he tried a few more times. Until he ran out of tomatoes. Interestingly, that night when we went swimming, guess what we found in the pool? A floating, tiny, green tomato. The kid managed to hit the pool from eight floors up, and the opposite corner of the building. Talk about a talent for naughty....

The next morning we got up bright and early and headed to the zoo.

We had PERFECT zoo weather. It was a little overcast and fairly cool. It even sprinkled for a second. All the animals were out and about, which they usually aren't when we go in the summer. It was a fun day. We rode the carousel and the train and ate ice cream and did all the stuff you are supposed to do at the zoo. Right as we left, the sun came out and it got hot and I was glad we were leaving, because I don't actually function well in the heat (unless I am supposed to function in the role of a deranged, screaming mother who is trying to suck the fun out of her children's lives as completely as possible- in which case I function just fine.)

That afternoon after a little shopping we took the kids to Chuck-A-Rama for dinner. Mind you, I DETEST Chuck-A-Rama (the idea that all chubby people like to go there is a fallacy- I'm living proof!) But, the kids had never been there and it seemed like an easy option to feed them. The food was as bad as I expected (maybe even a little worse than usual) but it was more than made up for by the fun we had watching the kids realize they could eat whatever they wanted. Isaac ate a little macaroni and cheese and about seven Slushies. Ruthie filled three plates of brownies- especially funny because she didn't like the brownies- I think she kept hoping the next ones would be better. Meredith ate pretty normally, and had fun feeding Lucy, who ate from everyone's plate at some point. I wish I'd taken pictures there. I think it was the highlight of the week for the kids.

The next morning, Zane walked the kids across the street to Temple Square while I cleaned and packed. They took some cute pictures.




After we were loaded and ready to go, we headed to the Utah Museum of Natural History. I wish we'd allotted more time for it, because there was a lot more there to do than we'd anticipated. They had a special frog exhibit with all kinds of exotic frogs and activities.

They also had a display of Utah Indian artifacts, dinosaur skeletons, a bug display (full of spiders and centipedes and all kinds of other creepiness- I would have given my left elbow for a can of Raid and an hour alone with the "displays.") My kids liked the rocks and minerals, and Isaac would have dug for fossils and played in the water erosion table as long as we let him. We will definitely have to go back sometime.

On the way home we stopped at the Warnick's in Orem to go to Brinley's birthday party. It was lots of fun to see everybody, and they have the cutest little backyard playhouse my kids loved playing in. They even had a bounce house inflatable thing they'd borrowed from the neighbors. It was nice to see Brinley on her birthday. She is such a sweet little girl.

Well, the natives are restless, so the rest of the catch-up will have to wait. Assuming that I remember what else we've done at some point!

We are the champions...

Well, not us, so much... but our piggy. Meredith's Cha-Cha Rhumba won Reserve Champion Gilt (which means girl, as I now know... along with way more other hog terms than I ever thought I'd be familiar with...) at the Millard County Junior Livestock Show (as you can clearly see in the banner.) Not half bad for the first try at this Stock show thing! Lucky for us, Uncle Tyle and Aunt Callie (who know what they are doing) made sure we didn't screw it up. Seriously, there are no words for how grateful we are for their help. (Not to mention the peace of mind it gave me to know that Meredith had her Uncle in there with her in case a 300 pound pig decided to try and bite my 70 pound daughter.) I have to say, it was honestly one of the most stressful weeks I've ever lived through. There was crying (Meredith, but me,too, I'm afraid to say) and screaming and laughing and definitely not enough sleeping. I think it was all worthwhile, though, to see how thrilled Meredith was with the whole experience.
At one point, Meredith asked Zane what Reserve Champion actually meant. He explained that if the Grand Champion ever does a Playboy centerfold, she is the default champ. She had no idea what he was talking about, but I've been laughing about it ever since.

Here's a picture of Meredith dressed and ready to enter the judging arena on her first day. Pretty cute, huh?

We are now in the process of writing thank you notes for all the people who supported Meredith and helped buy her pig at the auction. She has amazing grandparents, and in all truth, without the help of her grandpa's, we wouldn't have even broken even on the cost of raising her pig. It turns out that Zane and I have issues when it comes to asking people for money. We probably would have just let it slide. But people were so fantastic, and lots of friends and family chipped in, so Meredith will have enough money to buy a pig next year and do this all over again (unless I talk her into getting a kitten instead....)

And definitely also important, it was Miss Lucy's first birthday last Sunday. She had a great party with her grandparents and aunts, uncles, and cousins. In the tradition of her big brother Isaac, she took a face first approach to eating her cake. In fact, after her first handful of cake, she got disgusted and tried to knock the whole thing off her tray. She had managed to eat a good bit of it by then, of course.

Lucy is very into telephones lately. Whenever one rings, she calls, "Hello, there!" and puts her hand up by her face like a phone. We think she is quite brilliant. She added several animal sounds to her vocabulary at the Stock show. (Which is slightly unfortunate, because random women in the grocery store don't always understand why she is yelling "Moo!" at them.) She is a great kid. I can't believe she's one, although I know from experience now that I will say that with each new birthday and milestone. It's always a surprise that she can be growing up so quickly.

Whew! That's all the typing I can do tonight. I have to go to bed. The good news is that I don't have to get up at any particular time tomorrow. Summer vacation is FINALLY started around here!